One spring evening in March, six families gathered with members of the Victoria Hospice Bereavement Team to remember loved ones in a unique way. In a space overlooking the water at the at the Esquimalt Gorge Pavilion, artist and facilitator Jessica Hickman led family members in the creation of individual lanterns, in memory of someone important to them who has died.
Once the lanterns were completed, each bearing an image of their loved one, they were affixed to poles and illuminated. Participants then gathered to form a procession, and made their way to a beach at the Gorge Waterway.
There they participated in a memorial ceremony with support from members of the Bereavement team. Victoria Hospice Child and Youth Counselor Jessie Lane noted, “I observe in my work that families often grieve in parallel, rather than together. Having an opportunity to share in creative ventures, with common images and memories opened a space for families to check in, hear each other speak of their loved one, to emote, and to grieve together. It also gave people something to do with their bodies if they have a hard time sitting still in their grief.”
After the procession reached the beach, Victoria Hospice Spiritual Care Practitioner Elizabeth Barnard invited the group to place an object from nature in a mandala created for the ritual. A mandala is a geometric configuration of symbols. In various spiritual traditions, mandalas may be employed for focusing attention of practitioners and adepts, as a spiritual guidance tool, for establishing a sacred space and an aid to meditation. “For the memories that will always connect us,” offered Elizabeth, “we give thanks”.
Jessie observed that “gathering with illuminated lanterns by the beach, the product of this shared grief, to listen and speak together offered a powerful source of community, connection with the natural world, and ritual.”
At the closing of the evening, participants were encouraged to take their lanterns home, as a reminder of their loved one, and a touchstone for whenever they wanted to feel closer to their person in times of memory and grief.
“Having a tangible item to take with you,” Jessie continued, “while leaving items from nature behind, gave something grief-related, fragile and beautiful that could be carried back into everyday life.”
To see a video of the event, created by filmmaker Neil Parker, please visit our YouTube Channel
Victoria Hospice Bereavement Services are 100% funded by grants and community donations. We’d like to acknowledge the financial support of the Province of British Columbia (Gaming Grant), Provincial Employees Community Services Fund, Victoria Foundation’s Community Grants Program, Peninsula Co-Op, TELUS Community Board Grant, Island Mechanical Industrial Relations Association (IMIRA), and our generous donors.